Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Something Serious to Discuss

Hello my friends...

During these quiet days after the festivities, I've been reflecting on things in my life that need a bit more order.............. like my sewing room - - - ha , not likely...and my closets .... fat chance.

No, I'm thinking about things like my financial records, etc.  And my address lists..  which brings me to the subject of this blog - namely - online friends and how to 'stay in touch' in case of emergency. 

I belong to an online Yahoo Group (actually several).  Last year one of our beloved members and special friends passed away.  It was some time before the group could ascertain what had happened.  Several times, members have been out of touch for surgery, etc.  Fortunately, they usually pop back up...  Right now , one of my blog friends  (who is sick)  has not posted in a couple of weeks, and I genuinely fear that something is very wrong in her life, and I don't know how to check on her. 

In the old days, all our friends were 'physical', and usually our families knew them , too... or they fell into groups, like "friends from work",, or "friends from the volunteer group", or "friends I used to know when we lived in xxx"...

THE INTERNET HAS CHANGED IT ALL... now we have these 'virtual' but very real relationships...  and we don't always know our full names, our phone numbers, or our addresses.  And our families and partners don't have access to our online lives.

Nowhere do I have a list of "my internet friends'... 
And if something happened to me, no one would know how to get into my blog, etc.

Now, if 'something happens to me', well, frankly, I won't be worrying about it...

But, what if 'something happens to one of you'???? Well, I want to know, because I care.  Because my internet friends are closer friends than I ever expected through this medium.  And if you should be sick, or troubled, I want to try to help...  but I might not know.

Has anyone given this any thought? 

Yes, I know, serious thoughts for a Tuesday morning - but it is what's on my mind.

Kate











5 comments:

Pattilou said...

As a family we've taken over a pretty big insurance payment for Mom because it's a pretty big payout at her death and we started talking about lots of things heretofore we haven't talked about. We encouraged her to let us see the family trust and the trust was changed more to her liking. It was created in 1983 and was more for Dad. Now it reflects her more. He's been gone nearly 20 years, so it was time.

It has caused me to reflect what I need to do and how I'm looking at my stash. I don't want a lot left for my kids to have to sort through. So I'm slowly decreasing the size of it and hopefully in 2 or 3 years I'll have it down to just the boxes in my sewing room closet! I'll then purchase for each project I do. I just don't want lots of excess!

I have thought about internet friends. When one of my friends passed, her family posted the obituary from the paper to every one listed in her address book. I was thankful they did that. That is something I'm going to put in writing for my children to do. I'll also have listed names of places my stash can go. This is on my to do list for 2012!

Anonymous said...

I like some of Pattilou's ideas for her stash and address book. About 15 years ago, I prepaid for my funeral and made arrangements, plus made out a will. But I think it's time to check over and make some changes, plus add more details to what I already have. Thanks for bringing this up and sorry that I don't have any suggestions.
cindy

Catskill Quilter said...

Kate, a pretty provocative question for sure! I belong to a small --usually 8 women -- email group, and we have begun to share addresses and phone numbers, as we are all in "iffy" health. When we do not hear from someone in a day or two, one of us calls. I did have occasion recently to suddenly have one of my favorite blogs go dark - not a word - and I felt plenty worried by the time there was a new post! I hope more will weigh in, and perhaps have suggestions...

Marge Gordon said...

I’ve read this over and over again and it hit home. I have a blog, am owner of several groups, and have accounts on line that someone needs to be able to get into if something should happen to me. Thanks for the wake up notice!

Quiltdivajulie said...

You are not alone in thinking about such things. DH and I spent a lot of time during 2011 changing how we do things so that passwords and logins and contacts are accessible to which ever of us survives the other (and, at a skeleton level so that our eldest could access if tragedy took us both at the same time).

2012 will be filled with more such activities, such as adding notes with our last arrangement paperwork.

As far as keeping in touch, my address book is filled with names that have only e-mail addresses, to which I add random facts as I learn them (city of residence, mailing address should we swap, names of siblings, birthdays, etc.). Little by little, my stash of information grows (and syncs to my phone).

No one "perfect" way - only that we begin and then continue.

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